


Theory of a Wolfman

by Aretee



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-05-11 06:04:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5616427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aretee/pseuds/Aretee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bella slept with Jake and then mercilessly left to marry Edward. Ten years later her marriage failed, but she's a successful journalist. She wants to write a story about her once best friend and his very successful rock band. And she needs her friend. Can Bella remind Jake of his promise to love her forever? (Story is based on lyrics written by the band, Theory of a Dead Man.) AH/AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Head Above Water

**Author's Note:**

> Back story: I had a very difficult spring last year. An attack on me professionally left me feeling very alone and unsure of myself and I had two major outlets: writing and music. I discovered the band Theory of a Dead Man and their clever lyrics (from their album Savages) spoke directly to me during my struggles. Their other albums are also cleverly written and many of their songs just made me laugh out right. I feel a kinship with these men.
> 
> I listened to them so much that, while thinking of my unfinished stories, a new story developed in my mind based on their lyrics. I couldn't help it. And it got so bad that I created an outline, ages for each character, a tour schedule, and even a prequel. I hope you love it as much as I loved developing it.
> 
> If you haven't listened to any of their songs, I will try to link you to their youtube page so you can have an idea how it's going to fit into the story.
> 
> This first chapter is not specifically linked to any song, but here's a link if you want to get a head start.  
> https://www.youtube.com/user/theoryofadeadman 
> 
> I love these guys and I have since met them (VIP tickets at one of their concerts in October).  
> (Life has righted itself since then, btw.)

Bella stared at her computer screen not quite knowing what to think of the message. She wanted to write the article, but the terms for access were strange to say the least. They wanted her to travel with them for two weeks while the band toured and she wasn't even granted access to the band members during that time. It was shit.

Bella Cullen was a nationally recognized journalist who was successful enough to basically choose for whom she wrote. Most celebrities wanted her to pen an up close and personal piece because her style and reach crossed cultural lines and expanded her subjects' sphere of influence. She'd offered to do a piece on Theory of a Wolfman.

It was true that the band sold out huge arenas in cities across the country and teenagers everywhere were caught humming their tunes. Most kids didn't actually sing the lyrics in front of their parents because their profanity filled songs would make most mothers frown. But Bella was sure that the band would want a chance to explain the origins of their music and songs and possible provide a way to open a dialogue between the generations.

Yes, that's what she wanted to do. Provide an avenue in order to open discourse and help parents understand why kids and young adults were drawn to the crude and misogynistic lyrics of this particular brand of contemporary hard rock. Yes. That was her goal. She should write that back the publicist who'd communicated directly with Bella instead of going through her agent.

Bella was perplexed by the message blinking at her from her screen. Who was this Carli Mason and why did she think Bella would have to spend two weeks on the road with them in order to write a good piece?

_Mrs. Cullen,_

_On behalf of the members of Theory of Wolfman, I would like to extend an invitation to accompany the band for a period of two weeks while on tour this summer. I will be available to you to answer any questions you have about the history of the band and approved information about individual band members. There may even be opportunities for individual interviews depending on tour and personal schedules._

_Attached you will find our standard legal contract as well as our non-disclosure agreement. Please review these documents and contact me if you have any questions about any items or stipulations. I have also attached the summer tour schedule and an agenda of what a typical day on tour looks like. Please peruse this information and let me know if you are interested and which dates look best for you. I will do my best to clear or accommodate my schedule so that I can be as helpful as I can to you._

_I hope you don't think me presumptuous, but I find it much easier, and faster, to communicate directly with you instead of through my agency and your agent. Of course I expect that your representatives will review the legal attachments, but coordinating dates and travel plans will be much easier if done directly between you and me._

_I am familiar with your work Mrs. Cullen, and I look forward to meeting with you and developing a professional relationship with you._

_Sincerely,_

_Carli Mason_  
Senior Publicist  
Theory Of A Wolfman

Bella struggled with how to let this woman know that she really only needed about a three hour block of time. And Bella was sure that once the band members knew who wanted the interview, she was confident that she would be granted her request. Bella clicked on the reply button and typed an impersonal response explaining that she, Bella, was already well acquainted with the band members as she had grown up with them in small Washington town. She gave personal information about the lead singer, Paul and drummer Quil. Bella elaborated on a funny anecdote about Embry, their bassist, and finally explained that Jacob, the guitarist, was her best friend all throughout high school. Surely the band could give a block of time for an old friend.

Bella clicked send without even proofreading the message. She was irritated that this Carli woman thought she could control her access to the boys with whom she'd spent her entire childhood. She guessed that she should have at least opened the contract and schedule and looked at it, but she was too annoyed with the whole proposal.

Bella picked up her phone and called Alice. Bella may no longer be married to her brother, but Alice was still the best agent west of the Rocky Mountains.

"Bellllla!" Alice sang. "It's so good to hear from you! Are things all set for your summer tour with TOAW?"

"With who?" Bella asked. She actually realized that Alice was making an acronym, but Bella was tired of the culture that shortened everything. She thought it actually lessened the meaning and significance of too many important things.

"Jake's band, silly! Their publicist said she was going to email you directly," Alice said.

"Oh, yeah. She did. What's this about a two week tour? Honestly, I only need a few hours, Alice. Can't you do something?" Bella whined.

"Don't you think it'll be exciting? You're not doing anything major this summer. Nothing that can't be done remotely from your laptop. Go and party with the band!" Alice said. "I wish I could come with you. I love their stuff!"

"Alice," Bella interrupted, "their publicist won't guarantee me access to the guys. She stated it 'might be possible if band and personal schedules permit.' Like I haven't known these guys my whole life. I don't want to go through her Alice. Can't you just get me Jake's number?" Bella's computer sounded, indicating she'd received an email and Bella glanced over at it.

"Well, I tried. I thought it'd be pretty easy to track down Billy's phone number and get it that way, but the number they had when you were young has been changed and now it's all unlisted. Have you checked with your dad? Don't he and Billy still hang out?"

The email was from that Carli woman. Bella clicked it open. "Yeah, they do, but I haven't really talked to Charlie in a while and I really don't want to call him just to find out a phone number," Bella said while she waited for the message to load.

"Bella," Alice chastised, "you told me you were going to call him for Father's Day!"

"I did call him. And I left a message. He must have been out fishing," she said distractedly. The message was short. Bella read it while Alice droned on about the importance of family and keeping in touch with them.

_Mrs. Cullen,_

_Jacob and the other band members are aware of who you are and what you desire. The terms of the contract were drafted by them. If you find the terms unacceptable, perhaps you can write your article unassisted by the band. But the members of the band are also aware that will limit the scope of your piece and compromise the quality of the work that you usually produce. This extraordinary opportunity has been offered to you because of your previous friendship with the members of the band. We sincerely hope you consider and accept the offer. I have forwarded the attachments to your agent, Alice Cullen Hale._

_Please let us know at your earliest possible convenience._

_Again,_

_Carli Mason_

"Bella, are you even listening to me?" Alice asked. "Hello?"

"Yeah, I'm here. I just got a message back from Carli Mason. I can't believe this shit! Alice, you are cc'd in all these messages."

"I know," Alice sighed. "I read them. Did you even look at the tour schedule? They work hard and they're quite busy."

"Alice," Bella tried again.

"Bella, you need to go," Alice's voice was soft, but serious. "You need to clear the air with him. It's hindering the rest of your life and it's affecting your writing. Go on tour with them for two weeks. Realign your chi." Bella rolled her eyes. Alice's new obsession was yoga and she was always rambling about chi and chakras.

"Alice, I just want to ask them about their lyrics. I know their life stories. I don't need two weeks," Bella protested.

"Bella, it's been ten years since you saw any of them. The last time you saw Jake he was working part time as a mechanic on an Indian reservation. A lot happens in a decade. Aren't you proof?" Alice asked.

That took the wind out of Bella's sails. The last time she saw Jake she was a mousy clutz from a Podunk town in Washington. She'd run off to the big city to make something of herself. She married the boy who unlocked the world for her and then finally divorced him when he wouldn't let her go out into it. Now Bella was a self-made, confident, successful journalist who was respected around the world. She could spend two weeks with her hometown buddies of old couldn't she?

"Fine," Bella finally agreed. "You look over the contract and make sure I'm not getting screwed and I'll look at the schedule and let this Carli person know what best suits me."

"Yaaaaay!" Alice cheered and Bella heard her clapping in the background. "I just know this is going to be your best piece ever! This is really going to open your world, Bella. I can just feel it!"

Bella wasn't so sure. When she first dreamed up the project and had Alice's agency contact the band's publicist, Bella expected that Jake would contact her personally.

He hadn't forgiven her.

But she had an invitation. She decided that two weeks would be good. He'd always told her he'd wait for her.

"You're right, Alice," Bella said, cutting Alice's summation of the contract and the terms, "I need this. I think Jake needs this, too."

"Bella?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, Al?" Bella had opened the schedule Ms. Mason sent.

"Have you listened to all their songs?" Bella was comparing her calendar with the schedule. She was trying to decide which cities would be the interesting to visit.

"Ummm, no. Not all of them. I was concentrating on _The Bitch Came Back, Bad Girlfriend_ , and _I Hate My Life_. Why?" Bella decided that late July looked good. She'd done her research on these songs and other songs in the genre of their ilk.

"You may want to listen to the songs on all four albums and look closely at the lyrics," Alice prodded.

"Sure, sure, Alice. I will before I get there. I'll write Ms. Mason back," Bella sneered the name, "and tell her which dates look best pending the signed contracts."

"Okay," Alice chirped. "I'm glad you're going to do this. It's going to be good."

Bella hoped. Her life had been so dark for so long. She needed Jake in her life again. This was the first step. She guessed she'd have to do it on his terms.


	2. Ch 2: Since You've Been Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wanna meet the band?

"Embry! Shut the fuck up!" Sam bellowed, swaying a little from the motion of the bus. "Let her finish what she needs to say and then you can get your whiny ass back to bed." Meetings went a lot smoother with Sam acting as Parliamentarian. Ness could handle the guys just fine, but Sam had a shorter fuse and he kept things rolling.

"Thank you, Sam," Ness smiled. "Which brings me to you, Em. Do you think you and Seth can quit skirt chasing for just a few more weeks? Please? This has been the easiest tour to date. Can we keep it that way?" She looked at the two of them sitting on the couch of their rolling hotel, shirtless and in boxer briefs. Ness was glad they'd at least pulled those on before the emerged from the back of the bus.

"A rock and roll tour with no sex?" Seth asked. "That's, like, sacrilege." Ness shook her head at him having a hard time believing that smiley, dimpled Seth was such a dirty horn-dog. She'd known him since he was eighteen and Reporters hadn't picked up on his kinky side yet. Probably because he wasn't featured on stage. Seth's job was to keep all the instruments in working order. And he was good. Damn good.

"Fine. Get laid. I've got no problem with that," Ness said. "But can you do it in separate places and with one girl each? It makes my job a lot easier."

"We made sure they were old enough," Embry said defensively. "And, that was like, three weeks ago! Never fuckin' good enough for her is it?" he mumbled under his breath. That earned him a cuff on the back of the head from Jake. Embry glowered back at Jake but knew better than to do anything back.

"Yes, they were legal. But the two angry fathers I had to placate this morning still didn't like the fact that their legal but precious baby girls basically had an orgy on a band bus," Ness clarified. Paul snorted at that.

"What are you laughing at?" Ness asked turning an amused smirk his way. "Don't even get me started on you. Which reminds me, have you ordered Rachel flowers yet?" Paul looked smug.

"Yes." He smirked back up at her. "And why do you care so much that I appease my wife after she thinks I've offended her?"

"Because I owe her my sanity and I will do almost anything to secure the leash that woman has around your neck. Seth and Embry are cake walks compared to the fallout I had to navigate with you. If you stay married to her, I will pay for your kids' college," Ness declared. Drugged out man-whore didn't even begin to describe Paul in his heyday. "I've already opened a savings account."

"Touché," Paul said. Ness never understood the craze surrounding lead singers. Girls would do _anything_ to be used and almost abused by the lead singer of a popular band. Paul was the worst until he hooked up with Jake's sister, who somehow just stole his heart and he clipped his own wings.

"And Paul, your new herbalist is also an acupuncturist. He says he can help you with your throat and to lay of the effing ice cream," Ness said. "But you know your assistant can take care of that, right?" Maybe she could get Alan to buy Paul some T-shirts that weren't black. And maybe just a size bigger. For Rachel's sanity and the thousands of other girls' disappointment.

"Yeah, shit," he said wiping his face. "I forget I have him. You just do such great work, Ness." He winked at her trying to placate her. Alan was supposed to schedule appointments and take care of odds and ends

"How could you forget?" Quil croaked. He'd nodded off and jolted back awake. Ness figured he was up late on the phone with his better half back in La Push. "That's Claire's brother?"

"Yeah, and he doesn't like a faggoty-assed dweeb following him around all the fuckin' time," Seth said, shifting in his chair. "We've decided that Alan is in love with Paul and only signed on as his assistant so he could wash Paul's underwear."

"Don't wear any," Paul declared, completely unfazed. Ness thought maybe she could correct that problem herself for all kinds of reasons.

"He is not gay!" Quil shrieked. To that everyone, including Ness, laughed.

"He _so_ is," Ness said. "Which brings me to you, Quil," she said effectively cutting off his further protests. "I've got the tickets and VIP passes for Claire and her friends taken care of, but they're not sitting in the VIP section _during_ the show."

"What? Why?" Quil spluttered. Quil'd been working really hard to get into shape so he could be all ripped by the time he got home to his girlfriend. He'd always been a little pudgy, which made him a little shy. Out of all the places the band had traveled over the years, Quil found his true love and finally lost his virginity back at home on the rez.

"Because you play like shit when she's that close," Jake said. His tone was calm with just a touch of boredom. Ness smiled coyly at Jake after he rolled his eyes. "They can hang out before the show and after, but during she goes down with the rest of the fans." Quil took a breath to say something and Paul cut him off.

"Suck it up, buttercup. She won't know the difference and you can blame Ness. She doesn't give a shit," Paul said. Ness shrugged.

"True," Ness agreed. "Make me the bitch. Tell them I said the VIP section was oversold and since they weren't paying I couldn't squeeze them in. But make sure you remind her that the other VIP passes don't get them back stage access like hers does. She'll go along with it." It was actually the truth with Bella choosing these next two weeks to show up.

"Fine," he pouted. Ness could never get too irritated with Quil. He was just like an overgrown puppy. He got overexcited at the smallest thing and was sent scampering with his tail between his legs at the same amount. And he never caused her any trouble in the public relations department. It was easy to get tickets and VIP passes. But Jake was right, the closer he got to Claire, the shittier he played.

"That's all I have for now. Sam and I have one more item, but the rest of you can go back to sleep," Ness said. She watched as Quil, Embry, and Seth headed towards the back of the bus pulling the sound proof door closed behind them. The bus was designed so that sleep and practice could happen at the same time. It seemed that there was always someone who wanted to sleep and Jake was always writing songs. He wanted to be able to play whenever he wanted. Ness thought the extra expense was money very well spent. It kept the peace.

"What's up?" Sam asked.

"I pick Bella up today, and she'll be bunking in my cabin on the instrument bus." Her eyes flickered to Jake whose face was impassive. "I'll take Seth's and he can bunk with Jake."

"Why don't you just put her in Seth's, instead of playing musical bunks?" Sam asked. Ness smiled at how simple things were in Sam's head sometimes. She wished it all worked that way.

"Because Seth is a pig," Jake said. "We can't have the press staying in that filth. He's slept here last night so someone could clean it enough for Ness to sleep there. Plus, he's got his kinky ass shit all over the walls." He reached for Ness who moved over to sit next to him. "As much as I don't want Nessie in there, I know she's not going to judge Seth whereas Bella hasn't seen him since he was a kid…" he trailed off.

"Whatever," Sam said, "as long as Bella doesn't find herself in places she wasn't invited. I don't need her fucking with your head again."

"You kiss your babies with that filthy mouth?" Ness asked as she settled into Jake's side. Sam grinned at her.

"Emily likes my filthy mouth."

"T fucking MI, man," Jake groaned.

"I'm serious," Sam said getting back to the point. His eyes shifted to Ness, "don't let him near her if you think she wants him back."

"Sam, I can't control Bella, nor can I control Jake," Ness replied. Ness felt Jake's eyes on her and a slight smile lifted one side of his mouth. "But I can control schedules and appointments. I'll do what I can." She felt Jake's warm breath on her neck. He'd pulled her into a hug.

"Fine," Sam said. "I never really liked this plan, you know." Nessie was sure that was about the ten millionth time he'd stated that.

"Yes, and we know that she was about to write an exposé on misogynistic lyrics that could really bring us some very unfavorable attention. We have too much riding on this right now," Ness said for the ten millionth and first time. "We employ over half the rez," she reminded him. They literally did between the roadies who tour with them, the manufacture and distribution of all the merchandise, as well as a small production company. It was important to many, many people that _Theory of a Wolfman_ continue to be ridiculously profitable.

"He's going to be fine," Ness said to Sam, but looking at Jake. She reached up and touched his cheek. He looked her in the eye.

"Hurricane," Jake said. Ness smiled.

"Hurricane," Ness repeated.

"Okay, when you two begin to talk in your own fucking language, that's my cue to leave," Sam said and followed the other boys to take a nap before the next stop.

"One last item of business, Mr. Black," Ness said. She sighed as Jake's lips found the curve of her neck where it met her shoulder.

"What's that?" he asked, kissing his way up to her ear.

"I'm picking up Emmett today, right before Bella's flight comes in," she said. "I thought you might need," she inhaled deeply as he nibbled on her earlobe, "to work off some steam." He found her lips and silenced her.

"You're flying in my personal trainer?" he smiled into her cheek.

"You're getting flabby," she said, tugging on his shirt. He let her pull it off. "Right here." Ness's fingers plucked at some skin near his waist.

"But that's like, in, four hours, right?" he asked pulling her hand down his washboard abs. "What if I need a work out now? Feel the flab here?" He'd pulled both their hands into his shorts. Ness thought she'd better get Jake some underwear while she was picking up some for Paul.

"I am not giving you a workout on the couch in the front of the bus. I am not a groupie." He knew better than that.

"Can we make out, then?" he asked. She didn't need to answer with words. Ness had learned when she could let her hair down, too. And this was a nice distraction from the retched idea that her boyfriend's ex-girlfriend was coming on tour with them for two weeks. The woman who had broken his heart, not once, but twice.

The woman that nearly destroyed him.

"What was that?" Jake pulled back rubbing the side of his neck. "Are you fucking giving me a hickey?" He smirked to show her he wasn't really upset.

"No," Ness lied in a little girl voice. She was an adept liar, but after all they'd been through, Jake could see through it all.

"Uh huh," he said, leaning back in for another kiss. "Go ahead and stake your claim." He kissed her deeply and then bared his neck for her. "I think possessive Ness is uber sexy," he growled in her ear.

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts? Let me know what you think...  
> Want a preview of a song crucial to the plot? Check out Theory of a Dead Man  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPYojPBdNi4


End file.
